Note: This piece was originally posted on January 2, 2012. I am re-posting it for two reasons. One, it touches on something very important that I am in the midst of working through right now and, two, it will buy me time to write a post I’m just beginning that I feel deserves the space of a day to do.
Yesterday’s post was unusual for me. It may have sounded too raw for some of you and it didn’t get much of a response. However, Terry Litton wrote a very sensitive reply to this challenging post that I feel may open up a discussion on a topic that artists don’t openly talk about, except to other artists: the struggle of earning a living.
So I’ll be spending the day writing a piece that I hope will spur a discussion. Until tomorrow…
Max Ernst: Inspiration For the New Year
A friend invited me over the other night to watch a biography of Max Ernst, a film by Peter Schamoni. I knew of Ernst as an artist, but wasn’t prepared for how inspiring I would find his life. Max Ernst lived to create. While achieving renown during his lifetime, he never sold particularly well. But he made his art anyway. That his particular vision wasn’t well received, apparently, meant little to him. He created because it was in him to do. He worked tirelessly to satisfy his own curiosity, to please his own eye, to scratch his own, personal, itch.
Robert Henri says, “There are moments in our lives, there are moments in a day, when we seem to see beyond the usual… At such times there is a song going on within us, a song to which we listen. It fills us with surprise. We marvel at it. We would continue to hear it. But few are capable of holding themselves in the state of listening to their own song… The fun of living is that we have to make ourselves, after all…” It seems to me that Max lived within his own song and that he continued the process of making himself every day, no matter what change that might entail. To live is the point, as Max did, as Henri advises. To stay within our song as much of the time as humanly possible; to allow life to unfold as it’s presented.
Max seemed to flow naturally with his life, unencumbered by the social conventions that can hinder many of us. He lived fully, embracing whatever opened before him, seemingly unquestioningly. He simply leapt wholeheartedly into the various unknowns that were presented over the course of his lifetime, as innocent as a child. This meant that he was often in a state of flux, change his seeming constant. But the point is that he was true to himself, whatever that meant in each moment. If you watch the movie, and I highly recommend that you do, you’ll see that Max seemed to always be smiling, as though he knew some secret the others didn’t. And I think he did. The man was at peace with his choices.
I don’t know how he afforded his life but he seemed not to be concerned, at least in this telling of his story. He appeared to trust that his financial needs would be met, and they were. I do believe that when we are on our path, the universe will meet us there and support our continuing. But, in my own life, I often struggle with trusting that.
I am writing this on New Year’s Day, an appropriate time to reflect on how I’ve been living and what I might change. Today I resolve to take the example of Max Ernst’s life as a blueprint for my own, as much as I am able. I will endeavor to consciously follow the trail blazed by him many years ago. And I will find belief in his believing, determination for my vision, trust for this path I walk, Max Ernst my inspiration.
As Max, himself, said, “Painting is not for me either decorative amusement, or the plastic invention of felt reality; it must be every time: invention, discovery, revelation.” Indeed. Here’s to invention, discovery and revelation for us all in 2012.
Love to you all,
Jeane
 Invention, discovery, revelation in all our present moments.
Thanks Jeane;)
Grace
Thanks MAX!
Jeane, I read this post of yours for the first time today. I want to thank you for sharing your inspiration. “He created because it was in him to do. … to scratch his own personal itch.” These words are simple truth and so liberating and empowering.
Those horses, surrounded by all white – this picture is so different from the one you posted, a few days back, in which they are drenched in orange light, but it has its own beauty and serenity. Take care.
I’m so happy that you enjoyed this post Laura. You may want to try to find the movie. It was very inspiring to me.
Something I love about the blog is that it captures the seasons so well. Yes, those horses look completely different in the winter surrounded by snow than in all that golden fall light. Lovely of you to notice.
I loved this in 2012, and it is always relevant. Today it speaks to me personally with gusto. I have found that recently I more easily embrace these ideas when applied toward my daily adventures. (I have taken up my camera and am thrilled with it’s gift of inspiration to learn a new way of seeing and composing) It seems for me that when I was creative in a corporate environment – that was my play…I was learning many things from my peers and the “system” while I was there. To be always a sponge for each life haiku, or chapter. Or as with having children the joy of this lifetime responsibility adventure, as well as pure love exchange it represents. ALL have been precious and sacred steps along the path of what I am here to do. I actually do not see it any differently for me than Max – I always scratch my own personal itch:). When I look more closely it seems to be a state of mind, rather than a state of doing. All days of inspiration being equal in their output – the joy of being open to what is calling us. This is just what came to me this moment when finishing your gift. Thank you Jeane.
Ah, Grace, thank YOU. I’m thrilled that you’ve taken up your camera. It’s magical, isn’t it? And FUN. I find it to be an amazing creative tool that spurs on ideas, stories, inspiration. Maybe you’ll add them to the story of your life you’re writing for the blog 🙂
Perhaps, even, rather than a state of mind, a state of heart–a state of soul–a state of being…
We all gotta be grateful for Max, right? I’m just the one making him available in this way.
Jeane, this is to respond to both this post and yesterdays’. I would have written yesterday, but what you wrote required some thought. In a way, it bothered me, because I was having a hard time deciding whether you really are happy doing what do and living as you do and I had believed before that you were. This morning I see that you are happy but that your happiness is shaded some by uncertainty and fear. You seek to be independent and self-sufficient and support yourself by doing something that is seldom financially enriching. I can understand this. None of the things I do for the sheer joy of doing them have ever or will ever earn me so much as one measly centime. Money is a necessity but no more so than any other tool. It is a means to an end. I have worked all the different jobs that I have had in order to have that tool available to do the things I loved doing. And like Max and you I have always believed that a way, a means would always present itself as long as I looked for it. No one just “falls into” a good thing. They fall in because they were out there looking. Just keep looking and believe, believe, believe. A few years back I taught myself something that has helped oh so much when things were going less than well. I taught myself to laugh. On command. Spontaneously!
Anytime, anywhere! It is absolutely liberating and cleansing and it always makes it easier to move forward and not stew about things that are not as I wish them to be. Laughing is good for the soul. I think I know why Max always managed to be smiling. He realized that life is just too damned important to be taken so seriously.
Does any of this make sense? I hope so, but I worry that sometimes I just sort of run off at the mouth without really saying anything.
I believe too, and I know you agree, that what you speak into the world becomes real. So I say this: I wish you all goods things. I wish you failures that are the stepping stones to success. I wish you challenges to conquer and grow from. I wish you to go to bed each night tired and satisfied from a day well lived and to sleep easily and to wake with a smile to greet every new day. I wish you small successes that add up to become great victories. I wish you an unending sense of wonder every time you see a flower. I wish you a sense of awe with each and every sunrise and sunset. I wish you good and true friends. I wish you the joy of puppies and the purring of kittens. I wish you to never to feel like “the ugly duckling” ever again. I wish you happiness. I wish you inner peace and quiet strength. I wish your soul to soar on the wind like a great eagle. I wish you sadness so you will appreciate happiness when it comes to you. And I wish you love, wherever you may be, whenever you need it and in quantity beyond measure even as you wish it for others.
Live a truly wonderful day, today.
Yes, you are making sense and I appreciate the wealth of good wishes you bestow on me and put out into the universe. I think your use of laughter (which I also dearly love, but only when something makes me laugh naturally) is similar to my connection with my pets. I go to them when I need to feel better and it always works.
OK, I will endeavor to continue to believe and accept that what is meant to be will be.